(+1) Burrows Over Hoes (6-2) - Posting their first two losses of the season doesn't prevent them from topping the rankings this week. Over the last 3 weeks the Hoes are top four in average scoring for all skill positions except QB. The cracks may be starting to show in the roster though, with Higgins going down and the Chiefs on bye, the Hoes are not the dominant first place lock this week but rather more of a 1A team.

(-1) BucketOFsauce (4-4) - If the Hoes are 1A, the Bucket and its contents are 1B. The Trio of Allen, Gibbs, and JSN looked unstoppable early in the season, then Week 4 happened and it all came back to reality. This past week, they only managed to contribute 45.32 points (the previous 3 matchups, they were averaging 90 points a week) combined. I should note, their .500 record is less a reflection on their poor performance and more on the quality of opponents they have faced; dealing with the second hardest schedule to start the season. I expect Gibbs to run roughshod over the Cardinals this week and for the Sauce to snag another 2 wins.

(+1) McBridesmaids (6-2) - To be Frank (see what I did there?), there were three teams I considered putting in the number one spot for power rankings.  While the anachronistic Bridesmaids did have the highest score last week and have topped 160  twice, they also failed to reach 90 points in Week 3. This may be another down week for them as their number one and number four producers in Kenneth Walker and Tetairoa McMillan are on bye, leaving the starting lineup looking like an early contender for "most likely to be eliminated" in the survivor pool this week.

(-) Robinson Rice Cook(er) (5-3) - In my humble opinion there are three tiers in the fantasy league right now. We have the three top teams, then a middle five, and a bottom four. The Rice Cooker's currently lead the middle five by the slimmest of margins; they squeaked out a win over the Hoes (All hail Bijan!) and have won their last three matchups going 5-1 over that stretch of time. Heading into Week 5 they only have one person on bye and no major injuries (for now). Combining all those factors allows them to hold the four spot, ahead of the other four teams in this tier.

(+1) Raiders Prayer Circle (5-3) - Don't look now but the Raiders might actually be good? If their TE heavy offense continues to produce, than Jeanty can be a top 10 back this year. Meaning the Prayer Circle could be a top 5 team this year. With London finally getting the targets and Maye looking to be back in "Drake Maye" form, this team will continue to be a tough matchup for the foreseeable future. Fun fact, T.J. Hockenson leads the Vikings in targets, receptions, and receiving yards.

(-3) Welcome to Brown Town (4-4) - The injury bug has come again to Brown Town. This time finding their number one point producer in Lamar Jackson. His output has contributed 22% of all scoring done by this team through four weeks (The eighth most among all players on all teams). Oddly enough though, they may have upgraded that position through the Waiver Wire this week. Adding Cousins to the roster means they went from QB9 to QB7 overall, not a huge upgrade but certainly not a downgrade. If Golden can continue his TD streak and Washington can get back on track, this team has a chance to at least go 1-1 this weekend (Which would be impressive after losing Etienne and Jackson).

(+2) Mormon Super Soakers (4-4) - Rumors of the Champs demise have been greatly exaggerated as the Mormon Super Soakers find themselves sitting a .500 for the first time all season. They remain behind Brown Town primarily because of their Running Back play, ranking 12th overall for the last 4 weeks, averaging 7.9 points per position (first place is averaging 23.3 points per position). Wide Receiver had been their strength, coming in at number two overall, but Chase remains in concussion protocol and if he doesn't play, then it is up to either Brian Thomas Jr. or Jaylen Wright to take up the slack. Long story short, the Super Soakers might not be at or above .500 for long.

(+1) Zesty Boys (3-5) - I am not sure if it is funny or frustrating for the Zesty Boys. The two weeks they have topped 100 points, they have lost their matchup. The two times they have scored less than 90, they won their matchups (but obviously lost out on the median point wins). Their biggest weakness right now is the TE position, where they have ranked 12th every week (averaging .2 points a week). You can't say they aren't trying to improve though, currently leading the league in waiver claims and most unique starters. One other item of note, Puka might be a curse for this team, as both times he has started for the Boys, they have lost, while both times he was on the bench they won.

(+2) Swarls Barkley (3-5) - Lookout, Swarls posted their first 2-0 of the year and hold a commanding lead on ninth place (by 1.56 points!). Right now, ninth does feel like the ceiling for this team, their skill positions are averaging 19.3(QB), 11.3(RB), 11.4(WR), 9.3(TE), and 11.5(Flex), which ranks #9, #7, #8, #5, #2 respectively. Ranking fifth in TE and second in Flex might seem like positives but the difference between second place (11.5 points per position per game) in Flex scoring and and ninth (8.1 points per position per game) is 3.4 points per position or 7 total points, which can matter, just not when your RBs are scoring 11 points less, per position, than the second place team (11.3 vs 22.3).

(-) Strib club in da Hamptons (3-5) - The three digit suite in the club finally opened back up after 2 weeks of sub 80 points. That does not mean all is well in the Hamptons though. Outside of RB (pos/per game #5), they rank in the bottom half for all skill positions and rank in the bottom four for three of those skill positions, QB (#11), WR (#11), and TE (#9). Their highest producer is Javonte Williams with 74.3 points through 4 weeks and one of only two teams that does not have another player who has scored more than 50 points total for the season on their starting roster.

(-4) TakinMyTalents2Manila (3-5) - To say things have gone from bad to worse for the Talents might be underselling it. Their RBs have gone from fifth best to tenth best overall with the loss of Breece Hall. Their WR core has seen nothing outside of Chris Olave and Trevor Lawrence is turning into a good football QB which is translating to a middling fantasy QB (#16 in QB Fantasy Points). The haven't hit Disaster territory yet but they aren't far off it at this rate.

(-) Disaster (2-6) - When it rains it pours. The Disaster finally posted a score north of 100 first the first time all season, only to lose the matchup by 46 points. Still, they notched their second W via the median points route, another first for the team this year. If Nico really is back and Boston continues his impressive rookie season the Disaster may not remain at the bottom forever. Keep a close eye on their matchup this week, as they play our number eleven team in the power rankings for what might be an early preview of the Sacko Bowl come December.

(+1) BucketOFsauce (4-2) - The Bucket overflows again this week scoring 129.42 points, making it the third straight week of scoring in the top half of the league. They currently lead all teams in overall scoring. The team ranks first in average points for QB (33.5 points per game), RB (22.8 points per starter per game), and WR (19.6 points per starter per game). They also are sixth in their flex spot, averaging 8.5 points per starter per game. This team should continue to dominate until the Lions have their bye in Week 6 (and probably still then).

(-1) Burrows Over Hoes (6-0) - Age is just a number right (and so are the suggested amount of QBs you should have on your bench)? The Burrows continue their hot start with another win and another week of defying the injury gods. They are the only team in the top 3 for avg points per position for 5 different positions (RB, WR, TE, Flex, and Def), ironically their weakest performing position week over week is the QB slot, averaging only 18.8 points per game, good enough for 9th out of the 12 teams.

(-) Welcome to Brown Town (4-2) - Yes they lost both ways this week, yes they failed to cross the 100 point threshold but Brown Town remains in 3rd because of its past performances. They have scored the fourth most points through three weeks and rank in the top 6 for every positions besides RB for avg points per position. Only one other team beats that (see above). All of this to say, losing Etienne for an extended period of time may not be as damaging as it first appears on paper.

(-) McBridesmaids (4-2) - The McBridesmaids don't move in the rankings just yet but they failed to cross 90 points for the first time this season. That is the ninth time this season a team has failed to hit that mark, which ties last season but is still three short of the record set in 2024 (through 3 weeks).  The McBride-less Bridesmaids are still third overall in scoring but trending in the wrong direction as they have seen a drop off of 20 or more points each week since the start of the season (160.92, 104.06, 88.62).

(+1) Robinson Rice Cook(er) (4-2) - The Rice is starting to Cook up as Bijan and Co posted the second highest score of the week and the fifth highest on the season. Their WRs continue to struggle, ranking eleventh in avg points per game (8.8 points per position a week) and 4 points off the league median. This team will probably bounce around the fourth to sixth spot in rankings and miss the playoffs or DK Metcalf remembers he gets paid to catch balls and then this team actually threatens for a top spot. 

(+2) Raiders Prayer Circle (4-2) - How fickle is fantasy? In weeks one and two, the Prayer Circle's WRs were ranked tenth and eleventh respectively. Michael Penix Jr. (A lefty by the way) starts and Drake London goes off; allowing this team to have the number one WR duo on the week. Overall through three weeks this team has performed directly in the middle of the league, every single skill position points average ranks between 4th-8th. If this team can find one consistent star they may find themselves moving to the head of the pack. 

(-2) TakinMyTalens2Manila (3-3) - There are arguments to be made that this team should be at least sixth. First, they trail Raiders Prayer Circle by .84 points in "Points For" on the season and second, have score above 90 points every week so far (something only 50% of teams have accomplished this season). The main reason they aren't higher than seventh is the loss of Breece Hall (at least for this week) and Egbuka having an unknown quantity in Jalon Daniels throwing to him (who?). Luckily he has Makai Lemon and Marvin Harrison Jr. to step in an save the day... (yikes >.>)

(+2) Mormon Super Soakers (2-4) - Do not sleep on this team. Yes they only have two wins, but they are fifth in total points scored and one of only three teams to score over 100 points each week. The Super Soakers have faced far-and-away the hardest schedule so far. The next closest team has faced 25 less points over that same time, or a whole extra TE slot behind (TE's are averaging 8 points a week across the league). It doesn't get any easier this week as the face they Big 'Ol BucketOfSauce and its league leading 145.45 points per game. I am going to make a call though, they will be .500 by Week 7.

(-2) Zesty Boys (2-4) - There was a stat pointed out this week by Cline, I wanted to reiterate. The Zesty Boys, "had both the lowest points in a win AND biggest blowout." While that is indeed a hilarious stat, it should speak volumes on where this team sits in the overall power rankings. Their TE starts are averaging .26 points over 3 weeks (Loveland 0, .8, Gadsen .0) and they haven't seen the plus side of 100 since Week 1. With Caleb and Puka out indefinitely this team will struggle to put up points. If they can trade for a RB and Sadiq is a real TE threat then maybe they stay alive long enough for his stars to return and carry to the promised land.

(-1) Strib club in da Hamptons (1-5) - Hopefully the Strib club is over this Packers infatuation. If they had started any other QB, TE, Def combo besides Love, Kraft, and Green Bay, I do believe they could be 3-3 at least. Though it never bodes well when you have faced the third easiest schedule of the year and only have one win out of a possible six. Nabers and McConkey have yet to really get going but if they do, with a new QB-TE stack in Shough and Johnson, we may have them in the winners circle this week. 

(-) Swarls Barkley (1-5) - I am not sure what is more surprising, that this teams hasn't spent a dime of FAAB or that they are second to last in "Points Scored" through three weeks. Their best player in fantasy this year is Kyren Williams (34th overall and tied with the Vikings Defense) and their second best is Bo Nix (37th overall). This team isn't terrible on paper but if Flowers or Pickens can't get going, then this team will find itself fighting to stay out the Sacko Bowl at best.

(-) Disaster (1-5) - Just what this team needed another set of injuries, with Achane and Jefferson out, that leaves only Judkins, Gainwell, and Boston on the roster from the original starting squad that suited up for Week 1.  Could things get worse, absolutely, but the season is still young and it isn't 100% time to say this team is completely dead. Jefferson and Collins could come back, and if Gesicki and Rodgers continue to put up respectable numbers, there is always a chance to climb out of the cellar. Doubtful but not impossible.

(+3) Burrows Over Hoes (4-0) - One of two teams that is still undefeated,The Bengals & Boomers (thanks Steve) are off to a very promising start. Posting 120+ points in back to back weeks, they look pretty unstoppable but, and I can't stress this enough, the average age of this team is 32 and the youngest person on the roster is Joe Burrow at 29.  Historically, we see strong start from veterans and then there is a lull as either snap counts or injuries start creeping in. Let's see how long this train can keep rolling.

(+1) BucketOFsauce (3-1) - Having 3 of the top 12 scoring players in fantasy is going to carry you a long way. Allen, Gibbs, and Smith-Njigba have combined for 197.08 of the 306.98 points scored for this team (63% of the teams total). It should be noted this team is a classic example of Stars and Scrubs, if any of those three go down to injury the next three up are Kyler Murray, Chuba Hubbard, and Rashod Bateman. 

(+3) Welcome to Brown Town (4-0) - Our other undefeated team, the Town of Brown has shown incredible consistency posting scores of 123.06 and 123 in the first two weeks. What is even more interesting is how they did it, with Lamar Jackson and Seattle's defense complimenting Parker Washington and Amon-Ra in week 1. While in week 2 it was TreVeyon Henderson and Dalton Kincaid backing up Washington and the Sun God. I think this team is an early contender for Survivor Pool champ with how consistent they have been.

(-3) McBridesmaids (3-1)- The only team that topped 100 this week and lost, the McBridesmaids can console themselves that they weren't realistically winning this week, with or without DJ Moore. Okay sure, technically if they started Bryce Young, Doubs, Tate, and Corum they could have peaked at 130 but I don't know if I could handle that amount of clairvoyance from Frank. I still think this team is a top contender for the cup (Is the trophy a mug, a cup, the crown?) and when Moore comes back we may not see them below 120 until the bye weeks.

(-3) TakinMyTalens2Manila (2-2) - Maybe I overhyped them last week as they came crashing back to earth this week. The Talents look like a completely capable team that are going to have bad weeks and good weeks based on how well Trevor Lawrence does. The floor for this team looks like 6th place but I am not sure what kind of ceiling this team has when the starting roster only has 2 players in the top 10 at their position (Olave and McBride). Maybe T-Law is a top 10 QB that just ran into a Denver Defense, maybe, but for now, this team sits squarely in the middle of the pack. 

(+5) Robinson Rice Cook(er) (2-2) - The Falcons have yet to take a snap in the red zone and Josh Allen seems determined to score every TD by himself for the Bills meaning we may see Bijan Robinson and James Cook as two of the top ten players in yards from scrimmage with 17 total touchdowns all season (they are on pace for 1 TD between them a week). This team is not going to see the W column tick up very often if more scores are not generated from somewhere (Help me Jared Goff, you are my only hope).

(+3) Zesty Boys (1-3) - How this team isn't 0-4 is nothing short of a miracle. Losing Caleb and not having Puca avaialbe in Week 2 but still squeaking out a 6 point win was impressive. While the "Oops All Bears" lineup continues to struggle, there are bright spots here,  CeeDee Lamb and Jalen Coker combined for 40 points and Stroud has proven to be a very serviceable streaming option. If Nacua can get on the field this week, there is a real chance we see them pick up two more wins and sit at .500 by the end of Week 3.

(-1) Steve's a snake (2-2) - Last week I questioned putting a 2-0 team so low but I think this week has more than justified the ranking. They failed to score 65 points in Week 2 and unfortunately lost their starting QB and TE. While it is possible to stream both of those positions, I remain unconvinced that Ashton Jeanty and Garret Wilson can lead a team to the promised land when the rest of the lineup (Croskey-Merrit, London, Skattebo, and Jameson Williams) have only scored 61.2 points through 2 weeks.

(-3) Strib club in da Hamptons (1-3) - The hits keep on coming, with Dart being lost for the season, Nabers injuring his shoulder, and Ladd having to wear a chest-plate to protect himself from "Hospital Ball Herbert." If Tucker Kraft doesn't get back to 100% soon, this team is going to be Omarion Hampton and Javonte Williams carrying 100% of the load (80 fantasy point average here we come). I am not ruling out a complete turnaround though, Emmettt Johnson (Ken Walker can't get ALL the work can he?) has looked promising and Josh Downs is expected to have a larger role now that Pierce appears to be out for a bit(or season). Maybe there is still life in this club yet?

(-2) Mormon Super Soakers (1-3) - Brock Purdy trying to carry this team much like the real life 49ers, which is apropos considering both are wracked by injury. Unable to start Jonathon Brooks, Jordan Mason and Brock Bowers and instead relying on Kyle Monangai, Kaleb Johnson, and Christian Watson is not a strong argument for a repeat run at the title. At least Ja'Marr seems back on track and Adonai Mitchell looks poised to be a possible breakout.

(-2) Swarls Barkley (0-4) - The second team to not survive the survivor slopes; more like "Useless Barkley" am I right (no for real, hope his stinger isn't a big deal and he is back for Week 3). This team is in trouble, as one of only two squads to not crack 100 points through the first couple weeks of fantasy and the top 4 picks for this team through those 2 weeks have combined for 74.5 points. That would put them 4 points behind Josh Allen for 2nd overall in fantasy. 

(-) Disaster (1-4) - Whoa boy, this roster really is a disaster. On paper, they look like a solid team (for 2025 fantasy), with Drake Maye, Achane, Gainwell, and Judkins. However the only players currently in the top 10 for their position is Jefferson at 8 and Boston at 10. Through two weeks, this team has put up 146.04 points, three teams have scored more than that as a weekly total (Burrows Over Hoes, McBridesmaids, and BucketOfSauce). It is still early in the season but I don't like their odds for getting out of the basement any time soon.

McBridesmaids (2-0)- Hard to argue that this team isn't looking like a powerhouse of the gate. Posting 160 points in the opener with 5 players scoring 18 or points. DJ Moore looks like a real receiver and Walker appears to be 100% of Kansas City's offensive. If Walker and Taylor stay healthy this team may be on top for a while.

TakinMyTalens2Manila (2-0) - Fun fact, you won't find McBride on the McBridesmaids, (may I suggest Ken Walker, KC Ranger for them). The number 2 team looks to have the number 1 Tight End, with McBride having an 87% route participation and an whooping 33% of the target share (he also had 11 first read targets). Combine that with two bell cow backs and we may see this team put up 130 on the regular.

BucketOFsauce (1-1) - The Bucket did overflow this week with Allen having 4 TD''s and Gibbs adding 2 more. They are our first real beneficiary or the 2 win system, posting 141 points and losing doesn't sting as bad when you come out the other side 1-1. While they had the 2nd highest score this week but I couldn't put them higher than 3 as this team feels like 3 players and prayer (Chuba doesn't count, it was the Bears defense). 

Burrows Over Hoes (2-0) - At least for Week 1, the Old Men and the Fantasea worked out. I predict this team will look unstoppable through Week 5 and then the wheels come off as age catches up with everyone except King Henry (who is not a real human being). For now though, the combo of Henry, CMC, and Burrow look poised to make noise.

Strib club in da Hamptons (1-1) - Stribling going down early is probably going to constitute a name change but otherwise this team looks very well rounded. The Dart-Nabers stack wasn't fully activated but I suspect we will see a top score from this team when it is. Williams and Hampton look to be like a serviceable set of backs (Hampton looked good, Chargers just didn't use him enough imo). If Ladd's chest holds up and Kraft continues to ramp, we could see them moving on up the ranks to some place fancier than the Hampton's?

Welcome to Brown Town (2-0) - Matthew Golden and Parker Washington look like legit WR 1s, which means this team may be more than just a solo Lamar Jackson performance. This team still has a lot of potential issues, like when will Antonio Brown be back? Is Jalen Warren going to get enough work? Will the manager leave Dalton Kincaid on his bench again? (Stay tuned to find out)

 Steve's a snake (2-0) - An undefeated team at 7th feels incorrect but there are so many questions around this lineup. Does Drake London get a real QB this year? Are we getting the Jayden Daniels we saw in the first half (6-16 passing) of Week 1's game or second half (12-18 passing)? Is Dallas Goedert really the only pass catcher Hurts seems to trust? Until we know these answers, this team stays in the middle of the pack.

Mormon Super Soakers (0-2) - Oh how the mighty have fallen, last year's champ is got a reality check in Week 1.  With Bowers out and Mayfield losing the chip off his shoulder, the team barely managed to put up 80. But they put up 104.24 points you say? Right... and the Steelers defense won't be playing Atlanta's 3rd string QB every game. It is still early in the season and no team is really out of it so I expect better weeks ahead for the champ, for now they head up the cellar division.

Swarls Barkley (0-2) - I think it is fitting that Justin Herbert leads this squad of maybes and potential. Maybe they are 1-1 if they start Likely and Evans over Warren and Johnston. Maybe they win if George Pickens remembers his job is to catch footballs. Maybe someone should have reminded the Chargers they were playing the Cardinals. Even with all the potential if this team is missing their star WR, then this bed of Flowers may smell of 'Boo Boo'.

 Zesty Boys (0-2) - A late addition to the league, Zesty Boys come in hot with 5 Chicago Bears and put up 117.7 points, only to lose their first matchup and post the 7th highest point total of the week (missing 6th by 3 points).  A tough week for our newest member and I don't see it getting any easier. If you can't get a win when the Bears put up 59 then when can you get a win?

Robinson Rice Cook(er) (0-2) - Barely escaping elimination in the Survivor Pool, the combo of Cook and Robinson can only do so much when you WRs and TE total 18 points. This team needs to find someone who can catch the ball on a consistent basis and fast if they want to do anything but compete in the Sacko Bowl.

Gibbs Some (0-2) - Our first crash on the Survivor Slopes. Their WR core may be the best in the league but that isn't saying much when your starting RBs combined for 14 points and the TE might as well be an IR slot for all the good it did them. It is still Week 1 so there are moves to be made. If they can find a starting RB and TE and stream the correct QB throughout the year, there is a way into the winner's bracket. It is a long season and anything can happen.